September 26, 2011

Trying to balance it all...

I'm officially in my third trimester! I looked at the countdown on one of my baby iphone apps and it said I have 71 days until this baby is due! 71 days is not a lot of time. Sometimes I feel like this pregnancy has flown by.  Then other times I can't remember not being pregnant.  I am starting to really get a little anxious about how labor is going to be, motherhood and the realization that I will forever be responsible for another life. 

I thought I'd write a post about some pregnancy symptoms/side effects and some of the things that have been on my mind lately.
  • Carpel Tunnel:  It sucks.  Apparently is very common for pregnant women to experience this because of the swelling and fluid retention. I started noticing it in the mornings when I woke up and my fingers were tingly.  These days I sleep with wrist guards on and have to ask my husband to massage my arms nightly.  I have to say its a really annoying feeling to have tingling, burning and aching hands, wrists and even arms. 
  • Swelling: So far my ankles and face have started to swell a little.  Some days are worse than others and I find myself wearing more pants to hide my cankles.
  • Leg cramps: I haven't had too many of these but they are awful and wake me up in the middle of the night confused and in a lot of pain.  No great explanation as to why they happen to pregnant women but when they happen,  it helps me to flex my feet or get out of bed and stand up right away.
  • Belly button: I'm losing the battle to stay an "innie" slowly.  I'm hoping to make it all the way to 40 without it popping out but it seems to be getting smaller and smaller and ready to pop any day.
  • Linea negra: Yup its there.  All the way up my belly almost to my chest.  Lately a dark circle has formed around my belly button and its not cute.  I guess women with darker skin are more prone to this.
  • Hair: Looking pretty good and full.  I guess you tend to lose less hair during pregnancy but post pregnancy apparently a lot falls out.  My sister in law lost a ridiculous amount of hair in the two months after she had my nieces and nephew.  
  • Back Pain: I swear as soon as I hit my third trimester back pain set in bad again.  I had a bout of sciatica early on in pregnancy but it went away during second trimester.  I think its back now because the baby is getting bigger and squishing my insides. Yup squishing.  I'm super technical and clinical.  If I don't get up every hour or so while I'm at work I get a bad backache and my ass hurts.  Back pain also contributes to me not being able to sleep.
  • Hip pain: Since you can't sleep on your back while prego and my usual spread eagle tummy sleeping doesn't work either, I have to sleep on my sides.  This is causing my hips to just ache.  So now I wake up multiple times a night to pee, or because my fingers have gone numb from carpel tunnel, or to adjust because my hips/back are killing me.
Another annoying thing about pregnancy is that I feel like I need to rely on my husband a lot more.  I know it shouldn't annoy me and I feel so grateful that he takes care of me and really has pampered me this entire pregnancy.  That being said I'd really like to be able to lift heavy things (or even things of moderate weight), not be so emotional and not need him to rub my arms and/or back every night.  He always does and he is the best but sometimes it feels like I have to rely on him too much and I'm just not used to that feeling.

I'm such a whiner and I didn't mean for this post to go on and on but sometimes I think its helpful to hear about the crappy parts of an otherwise great time in life.  Yes I still think its just as incredible that I am growing a life inside me and I know this baby is worth all the pain listed above and much more. It doesn't change the fact that pregnancy is difficult.  On top of your body changing, your entire life changes and shifts.  Whether you like it or not, you become a different person in some ways.  For example, I have had to deal with the frustration of being phased out of work.  They no longer put me on important projects and I feel completely out of the loop.  I know they are just preparing for me going out but it still bothers me to have to compromise in this area.  I have always dedicated a lot of myself to work/school and I hate feeling useless and underutilized.

This makes me think about how hard it is going to be to prioritize everything in my life.  I've heard from different working mothers that it can be really frustrating to know that you can't do everything well.  You might not/probably won't be the best employee at work or the best mother when you have to juggle it all.  I mostly worry about missing out on my child's life while I'm at work.  If I'll somehow not bond with my little one as much or be there for them when they really need me.  Both my parents worked but my mom ran my dad's office growing up (and still does) so the job was definitely flexible.  I never felt neglected when both  my parents were at work but my SIL is a stay at home mom (for now) and is able to give so much to her children.  I know we will work it out to find some balance that works for our family but these are the things that have been weighing on my mind these days.

Readers, any advice for moms to be on finding a life balance, going back to work or any general advice?


  1. I think I have the same exact complaints. Pregnancy is awesome and super sucky at the same time!! I hear the same thing about parenthood too!!!! I've yet to even think about the baby/work/can't do it all balance.

  2. i feel exactly the same way! i'm so over being pregnant! you will be an amazing mother, and will eventually find a happy balance in your life between family/work/friends etc. but give it some time, and just enjoy being an amazing mama! :)

  3. this may sound zen and not feel totally helpful, but you will find a way to balance it... it just might take you a while to balance it exactly like you want to. :)


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